Friday, June 22, 2007

Unending VI: Ending

And....I cried. God...damn...it.

Unending V

Oh, the irony! Growing old and dying while the rest of the universe stands still!

Woe is me!

I should have never played God!

Unending IV

A TIME DILATION FIELD?!?!? SAMANTHA CARTER, YOU CRAZY BITCH!

Unending III

Okay, finally, in Splinter Cell: Chaos Theory (which i friggin got for $8)...you get a fucking COMBAT KNIFE! Yeah, it's wicked. AND you can hack into computers with your super futuristic binoculars! Damn! Of course, if you've had a few drinks, it's kinda hard to play the hacking mini-game...so it goes a little more like:

"Wait...no...that's it..."

"The entry code?"

"No! It's the melody to Funky Town!" *giggles*

Oh! Oh shit! IT'S STARTING!! WOOOOOOOT!!!

GOIN OUT WITH A BANG!! THERE'S A TAGLINE!

Unending II

Things overhead in an episode of Thundercats (damn you, Netflix!):

"Hear the magic, hear the roar! Thundercats are loose!"

"Oh my goodness Wilycat, look!"

"Rules are only meaningful if people follow them. Otherwise...they're just...words."

"Their evil ploy backfired on them!" "Ha ha! Yeah!"

"Go, gentle Brute-men, return to your simple lives and peaceful ways!"

Unending

Things I ponder as I get hammered in preparation for the Stargate series (grand) finale:

I am totally unnerved by the sexual tension between the animated characters in the esurance tv ads. I mean, seriously. Will they hook up? Won't they? Is she using him as an advertisement? Is he using her for shady car insurance quotes? What's the dynamic when he's the coach of the one player hockey/basketball/baseball/baseketball team and she's the star player? How do they celebrate defeating the evil robotic forces of the opposing team/insurance companies? What the fuck is going on here? Seriously.

At least they're not sex-tease selling home equity loans.

Thursday, May 31, 2007

Imitation

Okay. Had to get that last one off the top. Not much more content here.

(What? I'm at work! I shouldn't even be typing THIS!)

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do?

I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? Penis. I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do?

I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do? I feel a strange compulsion to post, but I have nothing to say; what should I do?

It takes all kinds, I guess. How very postmodernly meta something.

Monday, May 28, 2007

Nerd Power

Just got the ball rolling on a teacher blog/discussion board/forum/chat room/speak-easy...and I feel...intense nerdly satisfaction...

If you want in and I didn't email you, let me know!

Friday, May 25, 2007

Gentlemen, start your -ism's

Two things have been on my mind of late (as in, you know, this morning).

First, my God...NASCAR is huge. I mean, really friggin huge. I knew before I moved here how big of a deal it is, but I didn't fully appreciate the overwhelming cultural influence it exerts on everyone around here. For example, I have students who, rather than soccer, baseball, football, etc, have always been into racing. That alone would be (and has been) a very interesting cultural shift for me, but I also happen to live just a couple miles from Lowe's Motor Speedway. Now, i drive by the speedway everyday to and from work. It's a little ways off of I-85, which I usually take, but it's right on NC-29, which I use to avoid rush hour traffic. It's an impressive structure to say the least. What I didn't appreciate fully was HOW impressive the track, the surrounding lots, and the fans actually are. The Coca-Cola 600 is this weekend, and it might as well be the World Cup or the Olympics (having attended both, I can verify the similarity). People started setting up RV's 2 WEEKS AGO. Now, there are several miniature cities set up all over the countryside around the speedway, and traffic is a nightmare (so much so that there is a sign on I-85 that warns about "Race Traffic"...which sounds amusingly awkward). For the first time, I actually paid a little attention to the parking lot signs. Of course, by parking lots I mean giant grassy fields which accommodate dozens (probably hundreds) of campers and RV's. The lots are labeled alphabetically. I drove by Z and AA yesterday evening. Yes. The entire alphabet is used...and then starts over. Meaning, as far as I can tell, there are 26+ gypsy cities set up in the surrounding countryside. Amazing.

I'm thinking of establishing both a new word and new ideology. I think I'll call it "disdain-ism": a mode of thought wherein the individual ascribes to a constant, passive feeling of disdain for his surroundings (primarily, the institution of employment). Nothing new, really, but it sounds fancy-ish.

Why do I need a new ideology? Oh, it's mostly because I have TO WORK ON MEMORIAL DAY. Yes, in academia, national holidays and other federal mandates/laws/etc. only count if they have a direct benefit for the institution. For cryin' out loud! I work for the friggin State of North Carolina and I don't get a national holiday off? Come on!

Disdain-ism is born.